Santa was riding on a horse.He jumped the red light & a cop whistles.

Santa lifts the tail of horse and says:”Le karle number note”.

Sardar : Bhagwan mujheydard day dukh day, tension day, mujhey barbaad ker day,
meray peechay bhoot laga day.

Bhagwan : Abay salay aik line main bool biwi chahiye

Sardar orders pizza.
Waiter: Sir shud i cut it into 4 pieces or into 8 pieces?
Sardar: 4 hi karde 8 khaye nahi jayenge

Teacher: A for?
Sardar: Apple
Teacher: Jor se bolo?
Sardar: Jay mata di.

A man asked Sardarji, why Manmohan Singh goes walking at evening not in the morning.

Sardarji replied “Arey bhai Manmohan is PM not AM”.

Q:Why Santa is standing below the Tube light with an open mouth.

A: Because Doctor has advised him: ‘Aaj Light Khana hai!’

Sardar ke bagiche me bahut sare ped the,
Sardar naukar ko bola ped ko pani dal.
Naukar bola saab barish aah raha hai,
Sardar: abe budhu chhatri pakadke dal na!.

Sardarji fixed an answering machine at home.

Two days later he disconnected it because he was getting complaints
like “Saala phone utha ke bolta hai ghar pe nahin hai.

Why did Santa fall out the window?
- He was ironing the curtain.

“Darling,” said Banta to his new bride, Preeto, “Now that we are married, do you think you will be able to live on my small income?

“Of course, dearest, no trouble,” she replied. “But what will you live on?

Can you lend me 2000 Rs? I need it.
Please help me out, I know you have it,
I will return it .
A Sardar asks to ATM machine.

A Sardar enters shop shouts, Where is my free gift with this oil?

Shopkeeper: Iske Saath koi gift nahin hai bhai saahab?

Sardar : Oye ispe likha hai CHOLESTROL FREE.

Teacher: “I killed a person” convert this sentence into future tense.

Sardar: The future tense is “u will go to jail”.

Oye paaji, apni pregnant wife ko itne dard mein hospital
ki jagah pizza hut kyun leja raha hai……..

Sardarji: Kyun key pizza hut mein”Delivery Free” hai.

Doctor : Aap ka aur aapki biwi ka blood group ek hi hai?

Sardar : Hoga, jarur hoga; 25 saalse mera khoon jo pee rahi hai.

Try 2 understand n don’t disturb me more.
Leave me alone.
Last night I didn’t sleep thinking of u.
So don’t play with my life.
- Sardar says 2 mosquito.

Santa : “During my operation, Nurse, I heard the surgeon use a four-letter word that upset me very much.”
Nurse : “What word was that?”
Santa : “Oops!”

American says: “US mein shaadi E-mail se hoti hai..”
Sardarji says: ” India me to.. shaadi Fe-mail se hoti
hai…!!!”

Santa Singh goes to a TV shop and asks, ‘Aap ke paas color TV hai kya?’

‘Haa’ replies shop owner.

Santa Singh says, ‘Ek hara vala dena!’

Ek Sardar road se gujar raha tha achank usne jhuk kar road se kuchh uthaya aur achank chillaya…

Kamine log sandaas bhi aise karte hai jaise samosa pada ho.

Ek sardar ne doosre sardar se poocha: Oye Yaar! agar electricity nahi hoti to kya hota?
Doosra sardar: Kuch nahi yaar, hame candle light me T.V dekhna padta…

Flash news: A 2 seater plane crashed in a graveyard in punjab .

Local Sardars have so far found 500 bodies and are still digging for more…

Sardar told his servant : Go and water the plants.
Servant : It’s already raining.
Sardar : So what? Take an umbrella and go.